New Year, Same Me

It’s just a new year

I’m sure you have seen, “New Year, New You” or “New Year, New Me” plastered all over Facebook and Instagram. Is it a fresh start, a new do over or an opportunity to make excuses for what we did or didn’t do last year? Maybe you gained a few extra pounds, lost a relationship or spent way too much time on social media.

You don’t need a new year to set goals and you shouldn’t ever try to be a new person.

Let me be clear. I am not shooting down the idea of setting goals, creating a plan and making changes for the new year. I’m on board! For myself, I don’t want to spend an entire year missing out on new opportunities because I’m trying to become a new person. That’s why I believe in new year, same me.

You are you. It’s simple as that.

Work on spending time with yourself to set goals that can help you be a better version of yourself. The mistakes and errors that make you feel the need to be a new person are the structure and building blocks of who you are.

After my divorce, I worked so hard in creating a new image of myself. Rather than working to change who I was, I should have been working on becoming a better version of myself. I thought by becoming a new person I was going to fix all of my fears, anxieties and insecurities.

Believe me, I will be the first to admit that I have my faults. I am not perfect. Sometimes that can be really, really difficult to admit. Take the time to recognize your faults instead of trying to become a new person. Start the process of learning the tools on how to correct the behaviors you’re struggling with.

For example, I used to be terrible (or great?) at assuming. We all know what it stands for – ass out of you and me. But it took time for me to understand that I was actually doing it. Who would have thought? And then to learn how to push those assumptions away and allow the other person to validate for themselves.

In order for me to do that it required a lot of patience because it is so easy and quick to assume. I had to learn how to listen to what the other person was saying and not to what my mind was convincing me. Not only asking questions but also believing and respecting their responses. So I know, this was kind of a side track from the new year, new me. But we can’t change who we are. New year, same me.

Better version > new you

I want to be sure that you are setting goals to better yourself, relationships, career or any other areas of your life. Don’t create a new image of who you think you are or who you think you should be. You are already an amazing, beautiful person. It’s time to be honest with yourself, admit your faults and to become a better version of you.

Something some of you might not know about me is that it takes a LOT for me to get really upset. It usually comes from someone pushing when I’ve asked them to stop or extremely offending me or someone I love. When I hit that point of breaking, it only makes me more upset that I allowed my emotions to take control of my actions.

So I could say…new year, same me – I’m going to always blow up when someone pushes my buttons. But no – I’m going to still say, new year, same me. Yes – if you push my buttons I’m going to get upset but these are the steps I’m taking and tools I’m using to prevent that from happening.

New Year, Same Me

I’m not using it as an excuse. It’s not any easy way out. And I’m not ignoring the goals I want to set for myself. New year, same me is to remind myself that I’m the same person if I loose 10 pounds, wake up early or decide to never eat carbs again (LOL!).

Cheers to 2018 – may we all work on becoming a better version of our self and never forget the amazing, beautiful person we already are.